I read recently a comment Elizabeth Gilbert made while talking with Oprah, about love and soul mates. Since this has been a hot topic in my work, I would like to share a relevant article I wrote for Sibyl Magazine last year. Enjoy!
A Soul Mate or A Life Mate?
I was recently reflecting on the topic of soul mates, as I believe that a soul mate is a teacher, one that will show-up in your life when you most need to prepare for what is next and grow in your capacity to love.
Not long ago, I found the love of my life; the quickening of the heart was such that caught me by surprise, but I was ready. The resonance and fulfillment induced a daily surge of inspiration and creativity; I got to experience an expansiveness in my way of being like never before. I was in love with being in love.
During that year I learned more about myself than I had during any previous committed relationship, and I got to strengthen my boundaries, practice expressing myself no matter what, and heal previous resentment. Alas though I also became aware of its short term life.
The idea of letting go of what I thought had such potential, of what an ideal love story looks and feels like, was hard to fathom. My heart longed to belong and cherish each and every moment, yet it was growing apart because I was the only one who kept doing inner work.
There is something to be said about not quitting so easily when you think you have found true love, and yet, when enough is enough? When is the point where you stop compromising because now that you’ve grown a step further in consciousness, there is not much in common anymore? How can you discern whether there is still learning to be made, or you are in this because of what you once thought possible?
If you have strong Cancer and Neptune influence in your astrological blueprint, I can assure you that holding on to the vision of what could be, will be the guiding light. Until you wake–up one day to find that the light has been put out by the winds of needed change!
It is in the human nature, and especially for women to long for true love. It does exist, I know it is so. But the object may not be the other person; it may be you falling in an eternal crazy love with yourSelf, and in so doing learn how to truly love another.
Within that love then there is no need to merge or fear to lose oneself; instead there is willingness to share experiences, to witness the other as he is and to create a common life more beautiful and fulfilling than your individual contributions alone.
This is when you let go of the soul mate idea and open up to your life mate, so that the next part on the journey may begin.
Copyright ©2013 Liliane Mavridara. All rights reserved.
Originally featured in SIBYL Magazine: For the Spirit & Soul Of Woman, Feb-Mar 2013.